Roswell, GA Marriage & Family Therapist Shares: What Every Married Couple Should Know

Whether you’ve recently tied the knot, or you’re a seasoned veteran in the world of marriage, there are some fundamental things every couple should know. In this post, we’ll delve into the key lessons and wisdom that can help you navigate the journey of marriage.

As you might have already noted, marriage is a journey filled with love, growth, and shared experiences. But since it also comes with its fair share of challenges and complexities, it is essential to equip yourselves with knowledge and understanding to build a solid and lasting partnership. 

From effective communication to nurturing emotional intimacy, from navigating conflicts to maintaining individuality within the relationship, there are valuable insights that can contribute to a thriving marriage.

Let’s dive into 12 of such insights gathered from years of experience as a certified marriage counselor:  

• You are ONE

When you say “I do,” you embark on a journey where you and your spouse become a team, a partnership greater than the sum of its parts. It means that decisions are made jointly, considering both individuals’ needs and desires. 

Phrases such as, “We are a team, and together we can overcome anything” or “Our unity is our strength; we face the world as a united front” emphasize the importance of embracing the concept of oneness. 

You are a unified force that supports and uplifts each other through life’s ups and downs. Recognizing and embracing your oneness lays the foundation for a solid and harmonious marriage.

• Communication is key

Effective communication forms the basis of any successful marriage. It’s not just about talking but genuinely listening to your spouse and understanding their thoughts, feelings, and needs. 

Healthy communication involves expressing your thoughts and emotions clearly and respectfully while being attentive and empathetic when your partner speaks. 

It is a two-way street, where both partners actively participate and try to create a safe and nurturing environment for honest expression. 

By cultivating open lines of communication, you foster understanding, resolve conflicts, and deepen the emotional connection within your marriage.

• Love requires nurturing

Love is not a static feeling; it requires continuous nurturing to thrive. Investing time and effort in keeping the flame of love alive within your marriage is essential. 

This can involve simple acts of kindness, thoughtful gestures, and expressions of love and appreciation. Use phrases such as “I love you, and I’m grateful for you every day,” or “Let’s create time for date nights to reconnect and cherish our love,” to spur love.  

Additionally, actively working on your emotional intimacy, by sharing your dreams, fears, and vulnerabilities, helps strengthen the emotional bond between you.

• Embrace forgiveness and let go of grudges

In any marriage, conflicts and misunderstandings are bound to arise. Forgiving and letting go of grudges is crucial for a healthy and thriving relationship. 

Holding onto past resentments only breeds negativity and distance between partners. Instead, choose to forgive and work towards resolution and healing. 

Cultivating a forgiving spirit allows you to create a safe space where both partners can learn from mistakes, grow together, and build a stronger bond. Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness but a powerful act of love and understanding within a marriage.

• It is costly 

Marriage comes with various costs that couples should be aware of. These costs go beyond financial considerations and encompass different aspects of life. 

Firstly, marriage requires investment, commitment, and sacrifice from both partners. Maintaining a healthy and fulfilling relationship demands time, energy, and resources. Couples ought to be willing to put in the effort and make necessary sacrifices to nurture their marriage.

Furthermore, marriage carries social and familial costs. It involves building and maintaining relationships with in-laws, extended family, and friends. 

Couples may need to navigate new family dynamics and find a balance between their individual lives and their shared responsibilities as a married couple.

• Marriage is more than mere emotions 

One crucial thing every married couple should know is that marriage transcends fleeting emotions and feelings. 

While emotions can fluctuate over time, the commitment and dedication to the marriage should remain steadfast. Marriage is a lifelong partnership that requires more than just relying on the ups and downs of emotions. 

It involves making intentional choices, honoring commitments, and actively working toward the growth and well-being of the relationship.

• Learn the art of communication 

Communication serves as the lifeblood of a healthy and thriving marriage. It is the key to understanding each other, resolving conflicts, and fostering emotional intimacy. 

Without effective communication, misunderstandings can arise, emotions can be suppressed, and distance can grow between partners.

Learning the art of communication means expressing oneself clearly and honestly while actively listening to your spouse with empathy and openness. Use simple phrases such as “I feel…” or “I understand what you’re saying,” to express your thoughts and emotions. 

• Kids can sometimes break you 

While children bring immense joy and fulfillment, the demands of parenting can sometimes be overwhelming and may test the strength of a marriage. 

Couples must recognize this potential impact and ensure that they are on the same page when it comes to parenting. Having open and honest conversations about parenting styles, expectations, and responsibilities is essential. 

Being on the same page means having shared goals, establishing boundaries, and maintaining a united front regarding discipline and decision-making.

• You will marry your partner several times in your lifetime 

Marriage is not a one-time event but a continuous journey of growth and transformation. Throughout your lives together, you will experience different phases, challenges, and milestones that will require you to adapt and renew your commitment to each other.

As you navigate the various stages of life, such as career changes, raising children, or even retirement, you will find yourselves evolving as individuals and as a couple. Each new phase presents an opportunity to recommit, rediscover, and deepen your love and connection. 

It’s essential to embrace the idea that marriage is not static but a dynamic process that requires ongoing effort, understanding, and a willingness to grow together.

• Your partner may not make you happy 

While a loving and supportive partner can enhance your overall well-being, true happiness ultimately comes from within yourself. It is essential to understand that your partner cannot fulfill all your emotional needs or be the sole source of your happiness.

Relying solely on your spouse to make you happy can put unrealistic expectations on them and strain the relationship. It’s essential to cultivate a sense of personal fulfillment and happiness through self-care, pursuing individual passions, and nurturing your emotional well-being. 

• Take turns to be strong and support your union 

In every marriage, there are days when your relationship feels invincible, filled with love, joy, and a deep sense of connection. During these times, you may feel like nothing can shake your strong bond. 

However, there can also be months or periods when one or both of you may experience sadness, depression, or emotional pain. Recognize that these fluctuations are a natural part of life and relationships. Just as individuals go through ups and downs, so do relationships. 

There will be moments when one of you is thriving while the other may be struggling. It is during these challenging times that your commitment to each other is truly tested.

• It can’t be 50/50 all the time 

Achieving a perfect 50/50 balance in a marriage at all times is an unrealistic expectation. Life is complex and ever-changing, and there will be periods when one partner may need to give more while the other receives support. 

Understanding and accepting this reality is crucial for maintaining a healthy and thriving marriage. Instead of fixating on strict equality, focus on fostering fairness, flexibility, and open communication. 

Embrace the understanding that marriage is a partnership where each partner contributes their best effort, even if the distribution is not always perfectly equal. 

How Jousline Savra can help 

Those are some of the things every married couple should know. As you may have noted, they are the basics of marriage, which couples forget sometimes. 

But if you feel your spouse isn’t getting it or is having difficulties maintaining your marriage, contact Jousline Savra for marriage counseling. Based out of Roswell, GA, she can help you gain insights into common challenges such as managing conflicts, maintaining intimacy, and navigating life transitions. 

Couples can develop practical skills, strategies, and tools to overcome hurdles and build a resilient partnership through our counseling sessions. Book a session with Jousline Savra today. 

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